Raul Tabaranza blog

I TOUCHED JESUS I reflected of this thought in front of the Blessed Sacrament when suddenly memories flashed in my mind. Touching Jesus is almost like impossible, but my memories were telling me that actually, I have touched Jesus in a very special way. I was sent for an exposure in the Leprosarium with very little idea about leprosy, except that it is contagious, and that they are abandoned because of this. I was completely ignorant! But then inside, I came to know that it is curable with proper medication and hygiene. One time, we had our prayer together and as a sign of communion, I told them that we have to hold hands in praying the Lord’s Prayer. I felt the roughness of their hands, their fingers were completely eaten by the virus and many had unhealed wounds yet. At first, I was afraid and hesitant, but I was strengthened by my gestures, so I grasped more of their remaining fingers and broken palms tightly. After the prayer, they hugged me tightly fro my warmth, saying that

I AM NOT THat FAMOUS PRIEST…. I sat down in silence And thought about my priestly life. Images started rolling and a movie was presented to me. I saw myself, The actor in the most rural places of my mission, The bringer of God’s message, The minister and pastor. Yet, I am not that famous priest. I bless the dead, Anoint the sick And visit the needy. I celebrate the Eucharist and everyone is looking at me, Amazed of this white priest in the midst of black human beings. Yet I am not that famous priest. People came for reconciliation, For advice and celebration. People prepare exotic food And rejoice at my presence. Yet, I am not that famous priest. I sleep in villages, On the ground like them. I eat with them around the fire, Chat and dance with them. They cheer: ‘With Fr. Raul there is nothing for us to fear.’ Yet, I am not that famous priest. I am just one among them, But among us is the famous priest. I am nothing compared to Him. He is the reason of our celebration, Of o

DO NOT ABANDON OR FORSAKE ME O GOD! As of this writing, I am just sitting in front of the Blessed Sacrament. I just exposed the Blessed Sacrament for our adoration. I stayed for a time in real silence, when I was reminded of an event last year, while I was in one of our farthest mission, in the middle of the jungle. With the group of Apostles of St. Daniel Comboni, we left as early as 6:00AM, drove in the middle of Luangwa National Park, at the same time, enjoying the sceneries around, the many animals crossing (elephants, giraffes, impala, a group of buffaloes, zebras and more and even two lions). The road has always been bad, but the biggest challenges of the journey were heaps of sand everywhere, so that we had to cross in second gear and always with the four-wheel drive engaged. We seemed to have a good journey at first, but crossing the rivers and climbing on hills made the car suffer. We fell down, we got stuck and we managed after so many tries, with men pushing at the back

GOLDEN RULE Dearest friends, Peace and God bless. At around 5:00AM, in the coldness of the morning, I had my bath already and prepared myself for my personal silence in our small chapel. I then sat down, fixing my eyes on the cross when I thought of scanning the readings of my breviary. Then I encountered Tob. 4:16-17, 19-20, which kept my attention for so long, and it says: “Do to no one what you would not want done to you. Give bread to those who are hungry and clothes to those who are naked….” It hit me completely reflecting our attitudes and behaviors, and also, seeing the violence in the world today. There is so much expression of envy, greed and pride, and the ones who suffer (as our common refrain) are the innocent victims. It is such a pity to see our world so wounded. When are we going to stop these violence and killings, and instead, start healing the wounds of the world? I look back in particular my little mission, which is actually a very vast one. I am in such a

WHAT? JESUS’ BODY IS INFECTED WITH HIV/AIDS! I was invited to participate in a three-day workshop on PASTORAL CARE ON HIV/AIDS FOR PRIESTS AND RELIGIOUS, which was sponsored by the Health Desk and Home-based Care at Chikhungu Pastoral Centre. It was participated by Priests, Sisters and Brothers. We were 36 participants including the Bishop of Chipata Diocese, George Lungu. He was then wearing a white shirt with prints: “RESPONSIBLE LEADERS KEEP THEIR PROMISE AND LEAD BY EXAMPLE.” There was a special guest, whom we just called Cecy, a forty-five year old woman, an HIV/AIDS fighter but also HIV/AIDS positive. The purpose of the workshop was for us, at the end, to be able to draft a Diocesan Health Policy, which may take a possible view of any priests and Religious brothers and sisters to be contacted with the virus, either from family blood, ministry and pastoral works or infidelity. I was very touched of the question of our Pastoral Coordinator, asking us all: What would be ou

THANK YOU Thank you for sharing me your life Thank you for everyday thoughts Thank you that I can cast out All my emotions with you Thank you for the friendship Thank you for the joys and prayers Thank you for even the great sadness You have understood all Thank you for your life and being Thank you for that gift to me Thank you for the heart That listens all my pleas Thank you for seeing all my works Thank you for every prayer you say Thank you for wherever I go I am assured of your prayers Thank you for seeing meaning in my work Thank you for all the kindness Thank you because you never get tired Thinking of my life too Thank you for the encouragements Thank you for kindly words you share Thank you because even if I’m exhausted You never spare me out Thank God the Lord made you like this Thank God He touched your heart too Thank God He came down as Baby Vulnerable like you too We thank Him for the birth of Jesus We thank Him for the simplicity We thank Him for becoming human And live

RIVER OF PEACE My heart seems to question What the world could be If people continue to live in deceit Not choosing life but death? It seems the truth is buried Despair is chosen than hope, Fear than trust Perhaps the answer is Silence And to listen the beatings of our hearts And be led by the Spirit And build not a world of hatred But of love I dream of peace That it may fill our hearts Peace For the voiceless The hungry, landless and oppressed I dream A river of peace Not of total silence But laughter of children are respected A river of peace Where powerless are heard. A river of miracles That should begin in me. A river of peace, Where generosity abounds. Where good is shared, Where souls’ true love is felt Where friendship and unity, concord and reverence are given sincerely and received beautifully. God bring us back into the city of love, through that river of peace FR. RAUL

HIDDEN GIFT I came into this world Naked and bold I felt the kiss of Wind The embrace of Sun The caress of Mother Brothers and Sister I grew in love Respect and attention I developed admiration On things as I explored Soon I realized so well My soul can only tell At the peak of my life At the mountain peak I found myself an Eagle Winged, with lovely beak I soared up high above And found the real Love Hidden gifts emerged Soul wandered in streets I was so full of being Explored more my living I found the Lord again Beneath vaulted things I therefore offered my life The most treasured gift My soul has received Now I face life strife To kneel all I could give Then march to where I live Pilgrim my soul has tread Life did give me Cross to carry forward Pampered my soul in silence Meditation and serenity Crosses are gifts and blessings In all my gifts, He was there Climbing hill needs no effort My soul had to do was to wait Mystery of life was unveiled It is a beautiful exchange Of wondrous

SPIRITUAL CHARITY When I sat down for my personal prayer while waiting for the adoration to the Blessed Sacrament, I took advantage of being alone, and in serenity, I looked back, recollected my journey in the past days and wondered how God took me by the hand into the serenity of my soul. Then suddenly these words: ‘SPIRITUAL CHARITY’ flashed like a lightning, it was like a thunder hitting my soul in full vaults that I stood up and exclaimed with my hands clasped: ‘Spiritual charity’. I was lucky that I was alone or else they would think I am getting crazy. My heart beat faster and my lips were repeating the words in great awe. When I think back of my struggles, my agony of the scourging heat of the sun My long and tiring journey, My difficulties of sleeping in the villages The mosquitoes and complete darkness God helped me to face them all, Because of spiritual charity When I think of the discomforts of people and they crush me out, The famine and poverty and some rotten houses,

LOST AMONG MILLIONS OF STARS Chatting with people in the village one night I sat on the ground in the dark I leaned on the wall grass and looked up high And watched millions stars I searched the sky and ponder And find the meaning of each star Then asked myself the stars of the magi Where could it be that will also be my guide? For I was lost among millions of stars I was in the middle of nowhere, At the heart of Luangwa National Park Then my soul was filled with great wonder For the countless blessings in my life Like millions stars I searched more and scrutinized the sky I saw the dipper, like a shining scoop As if pouring out something on me I was lost in imagination From the promises of the millions of stars Then I shouted with joy “Falling Starrrrrrrrrr!!!!!” Which alerted and surprised the village people I wished I could be a doctor too And more wished flowed from my mouth But people were silent For tradition says there is ‘bad spirit’ to see Falling star among millions of stars

ACTUALLY I AM HOME…. You only heard of heat and dryness Of the plain valleys and wild Of the barrenness and poverty But this is where I live And I am home Perhaps you would call it destitute Sleeping in villages so poor Going to the wild for preaching Risking my life for people Eating food so strange Yet I would call it home I am so tucked with country lives Where sun dries up when it strikes Where water floods the place When the rain pours in buckets I travel them all with my bicycle And reach the land and meet people Simply because I am home Some of the footpaths seem no ends Yet people meet me on the way Clear my path when they are bushy Boil water for my tired body Cook maize porridge To comfort my hungry stomach Simply because they made me feel That I am home By day there is the magic sky of blue With clouds that form objects, me and you At times I lay down on grass Getting amused by their forms Get lost in mind and wander alone Yes, I am home By night electricity is absent I walk

NOVEMBER 29, 2008 Dearest Fr. Teresino, One evening, I sat down and read some passages in the breviary for the whole advent. I came across this line and it strongly hit me. I sat with these verse and meditated, so that, I have this crazy thoughts in my prayers. I just want this to be shared with you, so that you will become crazy too in understanding my thoughts. Hope you find it meaningful. JACOB’S POOR WORM (Is 41:13-20) “I the Lord your God (Raul), I am holding you by the right hand. I tell you (Raul), do not be afraid for I will help you. Do not be afraid, poor worm of Jacob, (you Raul) puny mite, do not be afraid. The Holy One of Israel is your redeemer.” I felt strongly the impact of these lines, the assurance of God’s help. Oh Raul, the poor worm! This is the image I always see in myself, when I joined the postulancy, the novitiate, the scholasticate and my first months in the mission. A poor worm! - A description of a struggling worm looking for a security in a cocoon.

FR. RAUL B. TABARANZA COMBONI MISSIONARIES CHIKOWA PARISH PO BOX 511276 CHIPATA, ZAMBIA PAINFUL JOURNEY OF A JOYFUL SOUL November 9th, 2006 Dearest Ati, Peace and God bless. I am developing this little essay I made in my scholasticate and turned it into a letter, that you may find it closely related to me, being your younger brother telling you the journey of his soul. I hope that when time comes for my life to turn back to God, you will see how the Lord have winged my soul to sour up in heaven, like an eagle, up in the sky, focus even in the great brightness of the sun. I am sorry, I forgot the author who wrote that: ‘Our experiences unveil part of God's wisdom. They move us to ask questions and to seek answers about our faith, and the intimacy with the "Other." The Lord is always in disguise- in particular events, issues, memories, trials and successes in life. These may seem hard to understand, but the hidden God, in his silence, presents himself in particular